Julie and Julia

Julie and Julia

I'm watching the movie and typing this and laughing at the witty
dialouges and cooking scene especially when Julie (Amy Adams)
struggles to cook the lobster.

This is a great movie and I think I will add it on to my lists of
favourite shows that I probably would not get bored watching. And
Meryl Streep completely transformed herself into Julia Child, I'm
momentarily surprised that she is the same actress in "The Devil wears
Prada".

There's a dialouge in Julia scene where her husband wrote to his
brother.

"Dear Charlie.

Julia in front of her stove has the same fascinatiom for me as
watching a kettle drummer at the symphony. The oven door open and
shuts so fast, you hardly notice the deft thrust of a spoon as she
dips into a casserole, and up to her mouth for a taste check like a
perfectly-timed double beat
on the drums. Then with her bare fingers, she snatches a set of
cannelloni out of the pot of boiling water, and she cries "These damn
things are as hot as a stiff cock.". "

Haha. I love the way he describe the cooking in comparison to a
drummer symphony and the added remark by Julia is funny end.

I keep smiling as I watched this, hw 2 person from 2 different era
finds themselves through cooking and the joy of feeding others and the
food. Gosh, I have the urge to taste some of the food in the recipes.

And I understand how Julie felt when she started on this project and
asked for a deadline because she says she never completes anything and
I can relate to it because I have also started many projects in my
life that I have put aside because I grew bored with it or because I
have lost my motivation. So i'm glad that I have carried on blogging
these past few years even though there are some dry spells.

I think it's a great and fun idea to start a blogging project for 365
days, but let's just keep it as an idea because I can't think of any
project I want to start now.

Do watch this movie or do you like it if you have already watched it?

:) I'm feeling happy today.

Sent from my iPhone

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I'm feeling sick and mind is woozy with thoughts

I have a lot of things to say but I'm feeling sick and tired and was not in the mood to blog.

Anyway, my head hurts, my eyes hurts & I think I'm running a fever. Not to mention that my eyes are itchy and watery and my nose is runny. Boo hoo =(

To summarise, I went for a job interview last week for a part time contract position. If they want to hire me, will start work next week. I hope to start in Feb though. Will know by Friday latest. (More abt work topic when I'm not so drowsy) I have so much to say, feel, think about my work life.

Hubby bought me a new iPhone for a present and I'm stoked! Happy as a clam! Wanted one since it came out Jan 2009 but it was monopolised by 1 telco and I didn't want to spend money on my phone. Always believed that a cell phone is for texting and calls, now I'm a convert! I have always loved Apple product. Had been using Apple Laptop since 2003! and had a few iPods too. And I had the urge to spend money and buy pretty pretty stuffs!

Went for Dr T consult on Monday. Dr T noticed that I was edgy and happy and a little high. I noticed I was high and deep down I was afraid I may crashed. We spoke about my dreams for this year, how I wanted to get a job, have time to do my job and be with myself and family, looking forward to get a new home this year, because we have been living with my mum for 2.5 years after our wedding and we are actively looking for apartments in this area that are not too expensive. My mummy will move in with us. So getting a house is a financial burden, that's why I need to work. I also spoke abt wanting to further my studies and get a Master degree. He asked my to slow down and was worried that I may be taking on too much at one time. Oh yes, I was also toying to get a second part time job to get an extra income.

I know myself, I tend to take on alot when I'm feeling good, because I know I'm capable and can do it. But I'm also worried that I may crash and when I do, I can't cope or do anything at all, and that affects my self esteem and mental state. He wanted me to observe my mood and to call if I get high beyond control or do stuffs of danger to myself. Asked if hub has made comments or noticed. I do feel good and at the back of my mind, I knew I had to watch myself if I feel low again.

I explained regarding the mixed mood I had, irritated, edgy, unable to concentrate, yet can't slow down my mind and want to do so much in such a little time. Depressed yet high on life and ideas.

So maybe that explains why I'm tired and I'm a little depressed. My mood has dipped and I'm having seconds and third thoughts about working because I'm afraid I couldn't cope and I may just embarrassed myself by being stupid and giving up.

One goal this year is to find a job and work through the year and not give up halfway. Hopefully no breakdown and if do, learn to maneuver around it, cope and still work and perform. Does this sounds unreasonable? I have to learn and start somewhere right?

I'm woozy but can't sleep and I hope my mood will bounce back and I can get some confidence to live on.

Recharged and happy

I'm back from my short trip to Malacca. It was great! I had a fantastic time and I went a little crazy shopping and eating all the awesome food! We walked a lot and met plenty of kind & polite people there. I feel happy.

I'm feeling lazy today. Reading blogs and going to watch some TV later. Really need to have a job, need to get my butt up and work for passion, money.. whatever.. I have to. I can't survive too long on my savings and I need to get my brain working again.

Hope there're good job opportunities in the classified tomorrow.

work so far

I have started work last week and it went very well! My mood was very good. I was motivated, enthusiastic and participative. I spent the 1st 4 days doing orientation with all departments newbies and only entered my department last Friday for real work.

It takes so much effort to be happy, I tried not to think so much, to tell myself to take things easy so as not to overload and overwork. But the tiredness and thoughts started to creep in this morning. My internal anxieties and the need to excel and compete is pushing through. And I wish I could go back to bed and not work again. How confusing. I wish I do not have to work yet I like what I'm doing so far. I have alot of things to read and learn.

I aim to concentrate solely for the 9.5 hrs at work (830 to 6pm) and leave promptly to return and be with myself, to do the things I want. Even if it means gazing at the ceiling. I need to be better. I fear the crash. It could be worse since I was really happy. I must listen to my body.

Merry Christmas!

I had a great lamb dinner with my family tonight. The food tasted really good and I was very happy.

I'm a little sad now. 

For once X'mas is over, what else would I have to look forward to? I'm lost and sad and my heart feels empty. But Christmas is meant to be filled with love and happiness and with lots of joy. I need to put this at the back of my head today and deal with it when X'mas is over.

For all  my friends,

Merry Christmas and may you spend the day with your friends and loved ones!

Take care,

Jessica

one week has passed...

oh my gosh, a week has just passed so quickly! Let me o a quick recap to remind myself what have I done for the week.

it has been fairly good. almost an 8. I have been out everyday, spoke to strangers, spent alot of money and been pretty active. What worries me is that being happy and such may eventually spiral downwards and I may feel low soon. see, I haven't been going out much for the last months, in fact, I desperately refused to go out and not take calls from friends. I was afraid that they would ask me out and I wouldn't know how to reject them. so yes, I was home bound and I spent my days on the computer and watching TV.

But I have been fairly active the last 4 days, in fact, I took the initiative to ask my mum and friends out!

Ok, let's see....

Monday

Met up with friend and her baby, spent the day playing with the baby, shopping and lots of chatting and walking. 

mood: good, relax +8

Tuesday

Out shopping with mum, collected my medications from the clinic, bought more stuffs. spoke to strangers and discussed about lipsticks.

was really happy and senses all high as I drank my latte. It was simply wonderful.. the whipped cream just taste so heavenly as it melted into the latte.

mood: happy, excited +8

Wednesday

It was raining, but I thought the dark stormy clouds were beautiful as it looms above the train station. went out with mum again, bought shoes and did some grocery shopping.

mood: was a little tired. ok but got a little irritated later in the day as the crowd and noise level grew. +7

Thursday

went out at 430pm, had coffee at Starbucks with Y. loved the x'mas drinks that they are having. 

spotted some cats, took pictures of ourselves and cats. Reached home at 7.

mood: ok +7

note

Just a note to remind myself that I feel good today. Happy, around a 7.

My period is coming, my back really hurts, but I feel really good. =)